Find Yourself (2020)

1st half sweet romance, 2nd half amazing comedy

People say the story got slow after the 1st half, but I beg to differ.
The story got FUNNY after the first half.
The first half is typical rom com trope -- main characters get together, second lead creates some misunderstanding between them, they break up.
And the second half could be really infuriating to watch if you don't like the second lead winning the lead's heart, but I found other more enjoyable things that made the watching process super worthwhile: the comedy.

The comedy stems from the characters' complicated relationships. Essentially we have our female lead who falls in love with an intern at her work, only to find out this intern is her new boss's son after they break up.
Also, this new boss and second male lead are friends, so new boss encouraged second male lead to chase the female lead and steal him away from male lead... only to realize later that the female lead's ex-boyfriend is his own son.

Also, second male lead has a niece, who is classmates with male lead, and confessed to the male lead...
but then later on the niece and the female lead's younger brother start dating...
(so if Minmin x Canyang and Luming x Fanxing were both couples... how do they address each other and their family members LOL
For Minmin, are the female lead's parents grandaunt/granduncle or mother-in-law/father-in-law?
For Fanxing, is Minmin her spouse's niece or her younger brother's wife?)

The step-by-step realization by the main characters, as well as by their colleagues, was a HUGE watching point for me as their facial expressions were often very telling. The family drama is also A+... the characters have so much chemistry.

Another thing to watch out for in the later half is male lead Yuan Song's attempts to win female lead Fanxing back. He has his parents on his side (omg when his dad found out his ex-girlfriend was Fanxing... that reveal LOL), as well as a new female colleague who was kind enough to lend him a hand.
His eyes and his hidden smiles when the female lead reacts according to his wishes...
beautiful "giving Luming a taste of his own medicine" work haha (in terms of being calculating in winning the female lead)

In the final few episodes we see some early themes come back. The leads' relationship started with the female lead saying things to male lead while drunk, and *re*started with the female lead drunk-calling male lead again.
And the ways they got each other to accept their love was also essentially just mirrors of the same conversation (and Yuan Song acknowledges this by saying "isn't this scene familiar" in the hotel room)
I'm all for dramas that do scene throwbacks like these because it shows the scriptwriter really put an effort in making things come full circle.

Finally, the side characters' quests for love and marital happiness were also super interesting to watch -- a huge fan of the cheating husband arc involving the female lead's best friend; it really added to the story about women in their 30's.
And the main characters' character development -- beautiful.

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I mainly watched this because I am IN LOVE with Song Wei Long, but it far exceeded my expectations. Now that I watched it, I would have watched it without him in it. A love story between an older woman and younger man. How their love grew, even with her fighting with herself thinking that she was too old for him. She didn’t want to hold him back, and get in the way of his future. She tried to form another relationship with someone her age, but she just couldn’t forget him. The drama also had very endearing side love stories and what they all went through. Most importantly, the endings of all of these love stories were great, didn’t leave me feeling incomplete. I loved every minute of this drama, and have watched it twice already.

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this drama about the romance between people of a big age gap is kind of different from the high school dramas i usually watch so it was quite entertaining.
pros:
1. the story progressed at a good pace
2. they showed how he fanxing has to find herself and what she truly wants, which is probably the purpose of the show
3. the acting was quite good
4. it had a bit of the slice of life vibe
5. the ost was nice
cons:
1. they talked about romance throughout the whole story( there was married couples, office and age gap romance though)
2. ye lu ming and he fan xing spent such a long time together that there so too little time for yuan song and he fan xing to have a nice ending
overall, i think the show is really worth watching, it’s sweet, funny and entertaining, with some valuable lessons to learn too!

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Rewatched Several Times

I been enjoying this series, watched several times from start to end. Is a FANTASTIC SERIES!!! I see Ms. He Fanxing as a Beautiful actress and her style in dressing is captivating too. The young fellow Yuan Song is attractive and his style is simple yet I find it interesting.
It contains many silly moments. Ms. He parents, at times are hilarious. Not to mention other cast members too. Either way give it a shot before turning away from it. Also, it has it romance moments as well as a couple of sad ones. Therefore, a series with combinations of laughter, tears, love and more, definitely keeps me interested especially having an Understanding till the last episode.

I truly enjoyed this series!!

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Um grande desperdício desses atores como casal.

Tinha tudo para ser bom, mas depois de alguns episódios as coisas só foram decaindo. A história foge do cliché e tinha tudo para ser um c-drama icônico e revolucionário, mas acabou sendo apensas a história de uma mulher adulta e independente que é na verdade muito confusa e manipuladora, até o ML anos mais novo que ela tem mais atitude e sabe se decidir. A junção da Victoria Song e do Yuan Song foi abençoada pelos deuses, eles tem belezas únicas que se encaixam perfeitamente e tem uma química bem natural, mas por culpa do roteiro esse casal simplesmente não deu certo, a Fanxing sempre volta atrás na sua palavra, não consegue se decidir entre coisas simples, é um pouco imatura e acaba iludindo as pessoas e empurrando seus problemas com a barriga, foi bem frustante durante o c-drama inteiro porque ela só se resolve no final. As relações dos personagens secundários também eram um pouco confusas e problemáticas e durante o c-drama inteiro surgem problemas atrás de problemas que foram prolongados sem necessidade. Não recomendo assistir nem sobre ameça.

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Be Prepared For Character Flaws

For this Find Yourself review, I would say that they have done a great job with the casting. It is hard to get a much older woman and younger man pairing that looks good and a pleasure to watch. But Victoria Song and Song Wei Long managed to do it and they did it well enough to make the whole drama highly watchable. They do have good chemistry despite the age gap. I wouldn’t say it is off-the-charts chemistry like those you get in K-dramas such as Her Private Life but it is good enough to make it sweet as needed for a romance drama.

For a young actor, Song Wei Long is certainly someone to watch out for. His good looks help which I’m pretty sure why some fans are driven to watch Find Yourself. In this drama, he does suit the character of Yuan Song very well with his boyish charm and teasing manner. David Wang gives Lu Ming a contrasting style to Song Wei Long’s Yuan Song with his maturity and life experiences so viewers can see the differences in the 2 men. Victoria Song’s portrayal of Fan Xing is a little bit more varied as she needs to portray the maturity of a 32-year-old woman in some scenes and the girlishness of a first time lover in others. I think she handles the different aspects of Fan Xing’s character rather well.

The Plot
Basically, Find Yourself is about the pressures faced by an older woman in a relationship with a much younger man. It explores how society and family members frown upon such relationships and do not expect them to last. So, it is not a rom-com that is heavy on fantasy such as Love The Way You Are but relates closely to the real world.

The relationship between Can Yang and Min Min also adds a great twist to the story. It becomes kind of funny in a way as it is then their turn to hide their relationship from everyone. But it also brings up the issue of hierarchy which is important in a traditional Chinese family. Overall, the plot is realistic and ties closely to modern life problems.

Not The Most Likable Characters
However, if there is one thing that could make you feel put off about this drama, it is the flaws evident in the main characters. Normally, you will root hard for the heroine but Fan Xing is not your typical perfect female lead. She lacks courage and conviction when it comes to loving her younger partner. You can say that she thinks of Yuan Song as a temporary fling as she doesn’t have confidence that their relationship will last. Hence, she has no intention to make their relationship public which is grossly unfair to him.

At the same time, Fan Xing spends a lot of time with Lu Ming and confides her love problems to him. She lets herself to be pushed into a relationship with someone more compatible. While the reasons are understandable, her character is shown to be indecisive and weak at times. She yearns for the love and passion that Yuan Song can give her but she ends up trying a relationship with Lu Ming as he is a more suitable marriage partner. Hence, Fan Xing has her flaws which not every viewer can tolerate.

Lu Ming too is not a sweet savior as he is domineering and cunning. He puts himself in a favorable position as a friend to Fan Xing with the intention to snatch her away from Yuan Song. Well, he is not all bad as a man needs to do what he has to do to get the woman he loves. He is a great uncle to Min Min and he does care for Fan Xing. But again, not everyone will like his character as his actions can also be seen as manipulative.

My Verdict
I am inclined to give a rating of 7.5/10 for this Find Yourself review. It is not as draggy and melodramatic as Here To Heart which helps to up its score. Fan Xing’s relationship with Yuan Song begins very early on in the drama to set the tone for what is to follow. The quick development of their relationship and the subsequent misunderstandings and insecurities she faced take up about half the show. It is not exactly boring but it does take a bit of determination to sit through all that time Fan Xing spends confiding in Lu Ming and being friends with each other. She is in a relationship with a guy but is seen spending a lot of time with another. That is the vibe that I got from the first 20 episodes.

The second half of the drama is better than the first. In the second half, the anticipation builds as to what Fan Xing would do and who she will choose as she considers her parents’ worries and old age. Would she listen to her own heart or go for the man that everyone is saying is the perfect suitor? So, I do recommend a watch for Find Yourself for exploring a topic that is often talked about. Perhaps if they have made Fan Xing more likable and the time she spent with Yuan Song a bit longer than she did with Lu Ming, this would would have gotten a higher rating from me. I guess if you want to watch it, you would have to be prepared for the possibility that the main characters would get on your nerves. Just concentrate on the plot then to enjoy the drama!

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Aggravating Story

SPOILERS.

General Rants:
Something I have grown to hate is the way the FL in these shows completely loses her personality by episode 6. I am also tired of romantic comedies and dramas that spend more time showing the FL with a dude she doesn't really like for a majority of the show or alone due to her family. I would love to see a couple building their relationship for the last few episodes. So many shows don't have them get together until the last episode and it is really disappointing because that is what we are here for, the actual love. (What's wrong with Secretary Kim wins major points for actually having the main love interests on screen together for the majority of the series not just the end.)

Also, I wish shows would stop casting older men in younger roles then trying to make us believe they are in the same age range as the much younger actress. The actor who plays the second male lead is 46 in real life and is playing a 37 year old against a lead actress who is 13 years his junior in real life. Yet the roles cast them as only 5 years older apart, which is not at all believable. He looks 46 which is fine, just cast him closer to his range, because his middle-aged look makes his character's immature behavior even more annoying.

Now on to the show:

Cons: I wanted to like the FL, but the character was portrayed as entirely too naïve just because she hadn't dated before. She is 32 and has a career, she is not an idiot, yet she is manipulated through the whole show as if she were a 12 year old. 3/4 of the show was spent showing her building - and in - a relationship with a sneaky, conniving old looking, rich guy who broke up her relationship the ML. FL lead refuses to see that is manipulating her. True to trope the FL decides everything based on others' opinions and not her own feelings. She breaks up with ML for no reason other than her own insecurity, then begins dating old guy to please everybody else. She puts up with so much crap from old dude that she would never allow from ML. The FL is supposed to be strong & independent but never actually is. She is so worried about her parents' & friends feelings yet has zero problem continually hurting the ML.

Old guy says believes he has a "destined one" but then spends all of the show trying to force and connive his way into a relationship with somebody who is taken. I have seen a lot of reviews acting as if we are supposed to find him admirable and feel bad for him at the end. He stalked this woman and her family and forced his way into her life, this is not the move fellas. It is creepy and I do not understand viewers who find him sympathetic. I had to stop watching when he was on the screen because I found his character so off-putting. The show wasted so much time on this character instead of giving us more of the ML and FL together. The story arc involving old guy should have been 5 episodes max not 30.

Pros: I love the relationship between FL and her twin brother. That is one of my favorite aspects of the show.

The actor who plays the ML is hot and his character is sweet, which is the only reason I kept watching. It would have been nice to see the ML featured more, we don't get to see much of his personality since he was onscreen so little.

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I didn't thought Victoria Song was very good at acting but funnily in this show she acted the best out of all. I am sorry but SWL's acting was bad, he didn't make me feel like he loved the FL or atleast their romance scenes weren't sweet to me. The show however did great in casting both for the older woman-younger man romance drama because SWL does look like a young boy beside Victoria Song. If you talk about plot, it's just like any other younger man falling in love with an older woman show out there now, nothing special. Their relationship does not have any solid foundation as well. Would have given higher ratings if supporting roles have a better story but it is nothing interesting too (also another age gap relationship thing repeated). Still, i think if u are into this kind of genre u can try watching it. Otherwise, there's nothing memorable about this show.

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fluff

I loved this drama since episode 1. I was a bit hesitant to watch this at first because nowadays I've been easily distracted and often find myself diverting attention to the drama I'm watching. However this drama is so sweet, fluffy, funny, and emotional on so many levels. It's definitely considered on the lighter side because there aren't any super intense scenes however, it is more on the realistic end as well. There are many societal factors that are subtly addressed throughout the drama. definitely great romance. The scenes are shot incredibly well it made me feel super fluffy inside >< Props to vic I never knew she was such a great actress. This is the first time I'm discovering the male lead and I'm totally in for it. He's not only handsome but plays his part so well???? last time I was so drawn in was for "The Untamed". damn. bravo! well done. I highly highly recommend this drama to all those who are thinking of watching. Please consider! you will not regret.

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I thought I'm now used to watch noona romance so I won't get that feeling of swetness but I have to say that I was completly wrong. This series have everything that I needed to see in a age gap relationship
The things I love most of this drama are :
- Character development
- Main leads amaing chemistry
- Story
- such a comprensive parents "To be honest I don't thinks exist"
- my Goal was watch more the main couple but I also fall for the 2nd teacher x student couple
- the ending was perfect I coudn't ask for more

Now that I finished this drama I feel empty, I wish there where some more episode but one of my sides also thinks those were enough. The romance was one of the best things of this series specially woahh the male lead killed it he was such an amazing actor he's perfomance here was great, he's looks are perfect like handsome, cute, attractive woahh I don't know from where to start.
Another thing that I loved a lot about this drama was that there weren't at all embrassing scenes in the entire show, everything felt so real that I was fully immersed, usually in most of dramas they tend to make the leads pathetic or something missing but for this one hhmmm perfect nothing has been missed to add on it

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must must watch!

At first i dropped the show because i couldnt understand WHY must i watch this show about this woman dating a younger boy like the plot seems so plain.. but i was sooo wrong!
I came back the second time with the intention to see esther yu and zhang yu jian (cai minmin n he canyang)
but slowly i fell more and more for the main cp than them
story:
never like any ive seen before! slightly twisted regarding the family relationship and dating relationship ahahah
i think its just me who caught a few notes of sadness in the story, as in the overall story, it isnt about the couple's love story but instead this show is a life lesson, maybe a love lesson too especially for those who havent had their first love.
i found ye lu ming slightly annoying. its indescribable. he was stealing fanxing from yuan song but yet he loves her so much but at the same time what he is doing is wrong because he is forcing he fan xing to like him and date him and in the end he got mad at her for trying to force herself to like him... so thats kknda annoying... overall i really love the story and all the small funny details about this show, like the sound effects and just all the tiny little details about the show..
acting:
this was produced in the late 2018, song wei long was only 18 if not 19... and his acting is just so natural????? like how...
im a fan of zhang yujian's drama like le coup de foudre and please love me.. he never fails to make me laugh and i relate to his acting/emotions like even before he cried (when his father went missing) i cried already because i sensed that he was so sad and desperate. anyways i love him alott
victoria song, let me just tell u her body figure is sooooo good that im jealous sighh. i wouldnt say her acting is superb but she did great!! i love her drunk acting alot ahah alot of aegyo/撒娇/acting cute. i saw the behind the scenes and everyone had so much chemistry especially the cp and cai minmin cp
music:
i literally just finished the drama 12 minutes ago, im currently listening to the tracklist while writing this because all the songs played in the drama really caught my attention. "Amazing" is my favourite. ( the one that sings in english)
rewatch:
I WILL. when i get onto my rewatch binge during this quarantine until the first of june (now is 23 april) on the lost its eternal love, maybe ashes of love then maybe this. but before all that im gonna watch skate to love. so see you all soon on their review page!!

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Immature FL, cunning, manipulative and annoying SML

I’m on episode 32 of find yourself but I just wanna drop it, I don’t think I can watch it any longer. I’m Only watching it for Song Weilong and the 2nd and 3rd couple. I mean I’m so excited for this show because Song Weilong and Miles Wei in one drama what else can you ask for right? Plus I started liking He Canyang. When I started watching it I’m really looking forward for the FL character cause I thought they would give us a strong and mature female lead since this is a noona drama, but no they didn’t. The ML is right FL was a two timer. Even if we didn’t have any relationship experience how can you be that clueless right? She would go to ML in just one phone call, she would go in her house, she even dated the SML before she sees the ML on a Valentine’s Day. And the person I hate the most in this series is the SML, he is very cunning and manipulative. I hate it more when he acts cute cause it’s so cringey. He is just the same age as the FL dad and it clearly shows no matter how many times they tell us he is 37 years old. And for the love of God they gave the SML more screen time than the ML I have to skip all
Of his scenes starting from a few episodes after I saw how manipulative he was.
P.S let’s not also forgets those professional adults friends that advised the FL to go on another relationship right away to cure heartbreaks?

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